Happiness Poll

In the spirit of an upcoming conference about happiness:

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Make Someone Happy. It’s As Easy As A B C

Recently I emailed a friend a list of 10 great things about him. I loved his creative response. And as I’ve been smiling for 5 minutes, I wanted to spread this idea today. Send a list of things you appreciate to people you care about. Like this:

S he has a neverending supply of ideas
U nderstands things that I don’t, like business
S miles in a really cute way
I am glad she is one of my best friends
E njoys rattling off funny lyrics to obscure songs that only cool people know

Just a few of your minutes can make someone’s day!

S U S I E

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Five MORE Things Happy People Do

I enjoyed reading Gabrielle LeBlanc’s research-backed article Five Things Happy People Do in Oprah Magazine. Mostly curious to see how many of the five I was already doing.

1. They find their most golden self.
Meaning, “striving toward excellence based on one’s unique talents and potential.” Making a life list and thinking about and acting on what you’re meant to be is the first step.

She quotes Richard J. Davidson, PhD as saying this type of “well-being is much more robust and satisfying than hedonic happiness, and it engages different parts of the brain.” My first “aha” moment about this flowed when reading the book Flow by Mihály Csíkszentmihályi. He points out that people are most happy when deeply immersed in a satisfying activity vs. partying or sitting around doing nothing in the pursuit of relaxation.

2. They design their lives to bring in joy.
Acting on #1 is the second step! Thinking about your daily life, how you spend your time and energy. Where you live, if your lifestyle harmonizes with “you.”

In a follow up post I will share an easy and fun way to analyze your life to discover, if you’re unsatisfied, what exactly you need to change. Feel free to contact me to ask directly too.

3. They avoid “if only” fantasies.
Or as Santana would say “wishing it was.” The second “if only” comes into your head, squash it!

4. They put best friends first.
She means, vs. people you don’t know. It’s true. The state of flow from great conversation and banter with people close to me is unbeatable.

5. They allow themselves to be happy.
“As much as we all think we want it, many of us are convinced, deep down, that it’s wrong to be happy.” Step 0. Get over this!

My Five More Things

6. They keep busy with things important to them.
I do believe that “idle hands are the devil’s workshop.” I don’t believe in the devil but that general idea. That’s why I love my life list. Even if I have spare time I can look at the list and find meaningful activities to work on, whether they’re fun or “work.” The times I haven’t felt like working on anything I definitely felt the downside.

7. They exercise and eat well.
I needn’t blather about how feeling great and strong physically impacts your happiness, need I?

8. They smell the flowers.
See YouTube video.

9. They don’t procrastinate.
Living each day with intention, breaking down your goals into steps, and taking action—does anything feel quite so good?

10. They spread happiness.
See a quick idea for making a friend happy today—which in turn will make you happy.

And try to smile even if you don’t feel like it. Be helpful.

With help from the Greater Good Science Center, parents can learn specific techniques to instill happiness in your children…and more importantly How Not to Raise an Ungrateful Brat. (Perhaps playing an online game called Darfur is Dying will help with that attitude of gratitude!)

If you’re in the San Francisco area and curious about the academics behind happiness, check out the Happiness & It’s Causes conference. Although it might make you happier to spend your money another way, sit under a cork tree with a good book, and just be happy.

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Daily Gratitude Habit Is Easier Than You Think

I’m grateful for the amazing bounty of fresh fruits and vegetables this year!

A study by Dr. Michael McCollough, of Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas, and Dr. Robert Emmons, of the University of California at Davis, in which several hundred people kept a daily log of things they were grateful for, concluded that “daily gratitude exercises resulted in higher reported levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, optimism and energy.”

At first, listing what you’re grateful for daily could appear to be yet another task you won’t get to. Tim Ferriss points out that “gratitude training” is the way to go, to make counting your blessings as routine as doing sit ups (or perhaps more routine for some!)

So here is a real-world example of how, if you break it down to the tiny things, you really can find things to be grateful for:

• I’m grateful for the nice evening light that caused me to open the curtains.
• I’m grateful my food is taking so long to cook, we settled on the couch to watch the DNC on tv.
• I’m grateful for my sense of humor that made me point out a man standing across the street, jokingly saying he was looking into the house.
• I’m grateful my friend had the presence of mind to shout out “I think he’s giving me a ticket!”
• I’m grateful that the parking person kindly let us off the hook. (It was a bizarre unobvious red zone in front of a stairway.)

In the September 2008 O Magazine, Oprah gives some good examples from her own gratitude journal:
“I am grateful for my breath and the recognition that I am here alive. Breathing. I am grateful for life. And for this time alone.”

OK a little deeper than my examples. But see how easy it is to find things to be grateful for?

Getting in the Gratitude Habit

What better use of Twitter, or status messages on your social networks, than to blast what you’re feeling grateful for? I know I know…there are better uses but it’s a good one!

A bunch of people have goals on SuperViva to feel more grateful or to start a gratitude journal.

The idea of seeing thousands of things I’m grateful for compiled does seem amazing. For now, I will at least continue counting my blessings to fall asleep. Sheep are so last millennium.

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